The worst part about having more than one child with Autism is it is no different than being a child in any family with another sibling with a chronic condition. My oldest, Jacob is comorbid and complicated. He is also loud, abrasive and an unusually engaging Autistic. He is a sensory seeker, he demands an audience, but on his terms. He also still loves snuggles, hugs and stuffed animals. He's awesome!
My middle son, John is a text book moderate Autistic.....on paper. His language was delayed, hence the moderate diagnosis. He is quiet, he is delighted to disappear from the world. Then when it's just you and him and he is comfortable enough, he is hilarious. He tells Uncle jokes, and he has immaculate timing. Better yet, he waits for your response. I praise every single Speech and Language Pathologist he has had since age 2 for that. And me, I tell the worst Uncle jokes.
While my oldest seeks out your response, once it agrees with his, my middle son waits for it. But he has to know you. You have to be close. A teacher he trusts (we have two this year, we adore them, a case holder and science teacher), a family member, someone he can dissolve in. Hard enough for a Neurotypical child (NT). It takes a long time for middle boy to connect.
My sons have the same diagnosis on paper yet they couldn't be more different. One arrived talking, one arrived silent. I would comment on their sister, but she would talk your head off.
It's a three headed monster. I kiss all three heads at night.
