I apologize for the gap between posts, it's been a hectic couple of months to say the least. The family moved house and thus school districts. We are in a smaller more dilapidated house and as we are renting we really can do very little to improve it during the lease cycle. Along with the obvious transitional hurdles; new schools, new teachers, new academic expectations we are also dealing with new symptoms of an old companion. Namely Early Onset Bipolar ones.
I can not remember if I went into much detail in previous posts about Early Onset Bipolar Disorder (EOBDO), today though I feel compelled, if not for me for my beautiful and amazingly creative son, Jacob.
The reality is Mood Disorders are as prevalent in the pediatric community as they are in the adult. Mood disorders are not caused, they are not brought on by lifestyle choice, substance abuse or cast down by El Diablo;) They are a genetic "gift." No different that hair or eye colour, inherited personality traits or if we pick the piece of chalk up with our left or right hand as a toddler. The Mood Disorder is a sleeping giant, it does not even know it slumbers beneath the person's psyche. It purrs amongst all the other sleeping traits than develop with time and like the ugly duckling is what it is; it is neither good, nor bad, it is what it is. It is black and white, it has no agenda, no ideology. It is as organic as our biological cravings or need to walk in the sunshine.
We as humans give it a personality, judgement, identity and a face. We paint mood disorder as if it has arms and legs and a tail that whips at the world. Makes sense, we anthropomorphize the animals around us, why not the ones that prowl our minds (see what I did just there?)
My oldest, Jacob transverses multiple dimensions of comorbidity. Sounds grand doesn't it? Essentially he has overlapping neurological disorders: Autism, Adhd and Early Onset Bipolar Disorder. We have come a thousand lifetimes with Jacob's journey, hit so many peaks and valleys. At the ripe old age of 11 years, 7 months and a few days we are again in the valley. New school, new routine, new expectations. Add to that the move, growth spurt, hormones, life then being a little boy still clinging to the safety of his Mother's leg, the fear so evident in his eyes. A Mother's fear to gently peel those arms away from her leg, he must feel he is walking in a tightrope that criss crosses and deceives the walker.
How can we wonder why his bipolar companion awoke from it's stable slumber and declared "I WILL hold you......come dance and play with me." Jacob's terror and fascination is palpable.
Tomorrow Jacob and I will visit his doctor to find a way to calm his inner world and put to bed Bipolar....it truly needs to sleep....again, until another day.
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